Monday, June 30, 2008

my education.

you know, a year ago, being freshly graduated from college all that, i didn't think, "you know what i think i'll be doing in a year? i think i'll be dressed in a blood drop costume, standing on the corner of a busy intersection in 96-degree heat, holding a cardboard sign that says, 'Will dance for blood'. you know, yeah, i think that's what i'll do with my life. and i'll even do the running man too."

oh man. it's not the worst thing to ever happen, but i am tired and sticky and delirious.

so if you're roaming about the Valley during the next three days and see a couple blood drops waving at you on a corner, be kind and wave and turn your music up, because then you'll get to see a blood drop dance. and who doesn't want to see that?

Sunday, June 29, 2008

quick! before the sun coma sets in...

oh yum. i love the feeling of being out in the sun all day, even though it was 100+ degrees today (apparently), and i love the feeling of probably being sunburned even though i slathered on the sunscreen, and i love the feeling of listening to goodgood music. it's been a grand weekend, and i don't want to think about monday.

so here's to miniskirts, dancing in the sun, letting the lake soak your feet, eating cherries and other things, giggling about floppy hats (and other assorted "floppy" things), dancing in the car on the freeway and letting the wind blow through your hair.

oh yes, and tacos. can't forget the tacos.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

lesson #8945:

while you are on your cell phone, do not cry tears that may somehow make their way into your cell phone charger port. apparently, that corrodes the whatevers in there and causes your phone to freak out. noted: no cellular breakdowns.

ahaha. i'm sooo funny. on a roll today.

also. printed out my americorps vista job description today, highlighted certain important parts of it (the parts that state that i am not to be a volunteer fill-in bitch 100% of the time) and stuck it in my "supervisor's" box. in hindsight, i realize this may come to bite me in the ass, but my "supervisor" should come to realize that talking shit about me and employing people to spy on me will come and bite her in the ass.

i swear, some of these people are crazy. and not the interesting kind of crazy. like the "hey, 14 years old called, and they're telling you to grow the hell up" kind of crazy.

speaking of crazy, someone in the office tried to use a printer as a photocopier. and no, i'm not an asshole. the printer did not look like it was multi-functional, or like it was a printer/fax machine/photocopier as the machine next to it did. she just waltzed right over, stuck her papers in the letterhead/envelope tray, tried to push some buttons and said to me, "This is a photocopier, right?"

like i said.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

summer eating.

i have never wanted hot dogs as badly as i've been craving them the past month or so. it's all the hot dog guy's fault. you know, he sits there with his hot dog stand and whenever i see dudes in business suits buying hot dogs, i just get the feeling. i want a hot dog. and not the store-bought mushy kind, i want a hot dog from that hot dog stand.

so one of these days, i'm taking a long lunch and i'm going downtown, and i'm finding the hot dog guy and i'm going to buy me one o' those dang hot dogs and it's going to be amazing.

Monday, June 23, 2008

like sand through the hourglass.

the snarky things that run through my head during the course of a certain Monday:

-"Oh, what's the matter? Tired from all the spying?"
-"Um, oh hey. It's 4:27 and I'm leaving right now. So, be sure to write that down or make sure that you call ****** and let her know. 4:27. I'm leaving. Oh yeah, also make sure to tell her that I took zero cell phone calls today. Remember that, okay?"
-"Oh hey ******. Just filling in for ****** while she's on vacation. It's 4:28 and 13 seconds and I'm leaving the office for the day. Make sure you write that down somewhere. I don't want to have to repeat it tomorrow morning when I come in. Thanks."


Monday, June 9, 2008

here comes the rain again...

I quoted the Eurythmics all day today because the weather mirrored my mood. A light smattering of rain droplets followed by 30 seconds of sunshine, followed by violent downpours, followed by thirty seconds more of sunshine, followed by torrential downpours complete with gusts of wind and lakes in the parking lot.

I honestly wish I didn't dread work. I'm trying to let everything roll off me because this isn't really worth all the energy. I can't live at this volume. It's just not worth it. I'm done in two and a half months and then I'm off to bigger and better things that I'm actually meant to do. So I'll just do what I do. They can't fire me so...

Been wandering around myspace, stumbling upon people from high school. About 65% of the people I saw were married and/or had at least one child, most had two or were pregnant with their first. I know I write about this kind of crap a lot, but seriously... when will it stop being scandalous in my mind to find out about pregnancies and marriages of people I grew up with? It's not entirely uncommon. I'm 23 years old. We're hurtling into our mid-twenties, and these are the ages where I entirely expected marriage and babies to appear.

Maybe I still think of all of us as 16 still... I remember them only within the context of high school, of hideous blue lockers, hallways that smelled like condiments. We're all frozen in my mind, frozen perpetually in adolescence. Life ever rolls forward and maybe one day I'll get used to this idea of adulthood, of being grown ups. We're not kids having kids anymore. Some of us used to be. But here we are.

The more I grow away from that particular zip code, the more I realize how much I can't hide where I'm from. When I first moved to Washington, I wanted so badly to be able to say I was from somewhere else other than Nevada. But now, when people ask where I'm from, I give a lineage of my residencies. It's all a part of me.

In other news: of course, after wandering downtown from work and waiting around for 20 minutes for my bus home and after a generally long day, I get on the bus behind a girl and this exchange happens between her and the bus driver:

bus driver: Hello! Oh look, Tweety!
girl: Yeah...
bus driver: (looks down. slightly alarmed look crosses his face.) Oh wow. Are you okay?
girl: Yeah. That's why I'm taking the bus to Deaconess...
bus driver: Do we need to take you to the hospital? Call you an ambulance or something?
girl: No, I've been walking with it for two days so...

I didn't see anything, but my first thought was gangrine of some limb, or perhaps a gunshot wound or some kind. I expected there to be blood everywhere. Apparently, it was a spider bite and those freak the crap out of me more than blood or gangrine. It was an interesting 5 minutes of my life.

Well. Maybe I'll have more exciting thoughts later.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008


Ran across this article today in The Onion. It's old, but still rings ever so true...

It's Only Tuesday...

It's true... I DO fidget, check the clock obsessively, and hide in the office bathroom to try to make the day go faster. And it doesn't work ever. How did they know?!

*sigh* Angerball. Don't want to be one anymore.