(re)turn.

Well, I'm almost officially finished with my first semester of grad school. It's been terrifying, insanely fun, insanely heartbreaking and, as always, fullfullfull of change.

I find myself longing for my old contexts, for my old spots in Spokane, even for Nevada at times. I miss my good friends, my old friends, the ones who love me no matter how many bad or good decisions I make. I beyond excited to go home to them, in all the places that they are. I feel like liquid without a container frequently. My friends and my family remind me of who I was, remind me of who I am now. I haven't changed that much. I think that since being here, since realizing that applying to MFA programs and moving to Bloomington are the first things in my life that I have done selfishly, entirely for myself -- since I've realized this, I've become more myself.

I'm definitely not who I was six months ago, and I don't make the best decisions, but I'm making decisions. I'm being honest with myself and I'm facing myself. No matter what, I'm in love with my life, and though I wander, I am not lost. And if I am lost, I'm going to enjoy the scenic route, darlings.